Surrender

Suddenly, with no prior warning, I found a cocoon being woven around me.  I was living my life, walking my walks.  And suddenly I felt these strings around my fingers and toes and arms and legs and neck and face.  The realization of being tethered! The pull from the strings!  Oh the feeling of suffocation!
I struggled to untangle myself to lame results.  There I was.  Inside a tight and unforgiving cocoon built around my whole life.  Unexpected.  Unwanted.
So I suffered.  And I wallowed on sorrow.
Then, with God's Grace, I suddenly calmed down.  I suddenly stayed.  Still. I tried to realize the cocoon.  The limits.  The shape and feel of the material encapsulating me.  Then I waited.  And waited.  Until I felt a smile on my lips.
Here I am now.  In this tight cocoon imprisoning me.  I am dreaming of the days I will be free again.  A day I can walk again and talk again and feel the rain again on my skin.
When that day comes, I will live my life.

Sometimes

Sometimes it's all right to feel down.

Sometimes it's all right to feel bored.

Sometimes it's all right to feel cheated.

Sometimes it's all right to feel cold.

But then there comes a time

it's hard to believe

Sometimes there is too much too heal

Just too much to heal

Then there is pain

There is no one to blame

But just one

The only one

You thought you trusted the most

It hurts to ache

I'm not sure anymore

How can I forget?

How can I cure?

This pain within?

This trust without?

Hawaii

Day 1: we arrived. Per many recommendations, after picking up the rental minivan, we made a stop at Costco. The drive to the hotel afterwards was nice and different with a warm yet pleasant weather. We checked in at Kaanapali Alii at a beautiful mountain view two bedroom apartment rental. The kids made a splash in the pool and also ocean.

Day 2: we made a plan and some activity reservations including dinner at sunset on a table with a view at Ruth's Chris in Lahaaina. In the morning we hopped between the three pools in the hotel area. In the evening we walked in Lahaaina outlets and then a delicious Hawaiian steak.

Day 3: Drove to Hana. We woke up around 6:30 AM and headed out before 7:45. There was virtually no traffic and the drive was marvelous.

Little m was badly sunburned. But we managed it with home remedies.

The most fascinating sight of the trip was the Rainbow Eucalyptus. They were amazingly beautiful and different. Made me think of a certain eucalyptus grove that has no resemblance of this one.

We made a splash at the Seven Sacred Pools. Our guide was a Gypsy GPS which was informative and fun. On the hind side we thought the cave right before Hana could be the last stop. By the time we head back it was 5pm already and the kids and grown ups were getting a bit carsick and antsy. The final stop was at little town on Paia where we spotted the Mana Store with a character. Much fun walking in the isles and exploring the new. The highlight was a root called Termeric. The Termeric!! I marinated the Mahi Mahi with it the next day and it was delicious!

Day 4: we took it easy. Stayed indoors for most of the morn and went to the pools in the afternoon. I made the fish for lunch and in the evening we walked to Whailers Village by Westin. It was fun. M got me a necklace with Hawaiian waves design. Loved it and the gesture. We stopped at Hula Grills for some tropical drinks.

Day 5: drove to Napili beach to spot turtles but found none. By noon we decided to drive to Haleakala dormant volcano. It was beautiful!

Day 6: sailed to two snorkeling spots including Malakani and spotted many fish and a few turtles. Much much fun!

We have a reservation for Ulalena in Lahaina. I'm excited to dress up and walk the beach town afterward. Looking forward to it all. 

To Divorce A Family

When you feel alienated from a closed family member, it feels sad. You think about all the discriminations, all the selfishness, all the lies, all the ugly powers imposed, then you feel miserable. You want to flee from it. But it is a relative you can't divorce.  You are stuck. You have to make the best of it. And keep your trust only and only on te Beloved.