Power Talk - Using Language to Build Authority and Influence
- Language from the center directs rather than responds, makes statements, contextualizes with authority, contradicts, argues, and disagrees, and practices affect of control. It sounds like competence, knowledge, and authority.
- Language from the edge responds rather than directs, asks questions, contextualizes with protective strategies, avoids open argument, and practices conversational maintenance.
- Think about your goal or intention before a conversation.
- Consider analyzing yourself after conversation with either of the two styles of language.
- Match your style with your intention.
- Your voice message tells stuff about you.
- The language of your work setting can be like a "foreign language" to be learned. Listen to the words and styles in the meetings and learn.
- After the meetings do some research to learn what was heard and what was remembered.
- Figure out the language of your work, then figure out if you can adopt it, then figure out if you want to adopt it. If positive, practice and practice.
- Work and its daily politics is like war. One must choose her battles and her weapons.
- Early in the meeting most want to talk about their opinions so they don't listen. Bring up your strong and new ideas in the middle.
- "Neutrality complements authority"
- If you are committed to the value of your opinion, rephrase it and say it again. Be concise and don't give up.
- Direct when you can and step back when you should.
- "This (job) is war. You want to win. There will be costs. Choose your battles - and your weapons."
- "You can call your style 'team management' if you want but remember that teams are full of internal politics, turf wars, competitiveness, and resentment. Teams need a captain, a leader, or a cox. They want their leader to be wise, fair, and enthusiastic."
- "Since words produce something only approximately like what we mean, meeting face-to-face offers the best chance of clear communication."
- " E-mail is not private."
- "If the idea is thirty second old, it's probably too hot to pass along. Reflect, let things cool, then share."
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