A Saturday

Sitting in the library behind a study desk by the window to prepare for my presentation for my course, I gaze at the distant mountains. A mild fog and then dark green bushes on the whole mountain skirt is inviting. Closer to the building there are taller trees. Fresh green leaves, dark red leaves, and palm trees. I realize once more that I have started liking and enjoying Northern California. The sun is still too bright for me here and I still enjoy cloudy days better, but there is beauty. And I like this beauty.
It was about three weeks after the new year, when we had a lunch gathering with Iranian colleagues from other branches in Bay Area to celebrate the new year. I was sitting in MS's van while we were driving to the restaurant. Gazing out of the car window I watched the green grass on the road premises, and the wildest wild flowers in terrain. And that was my very first realization of the beautiful California.
Spring makes every thing prettier I believe.

وبلاگ

یک مصاحبه با یک خبرنگار عراقی که از عراق برگشته بود...

Blog: Inside Iraq

Post: http://washingtonbureau.typepad.com/iraq/2007/05/a_look_through_.html

خیلی احساس میکنم که این مادر را میفهمم!

به نظر من زمان جنگ در دنیا گذشته است. اما جنگ نه تنها ادامه دارد، جنگها هنوز در پیشند... تاریخ تکرار میشود؟ یا انسان نادانتر؟

Interesting life

We were throwing a congratulatory lunch party for a colleague (AA) who is leaving to Hawaii tomorrow to get married by the end of the next week. I was sitting at the table with another colleague (VM) who is originally from Iraq. We started chatting and I was trying to memorize some Spanish phrases he was trying to teach me(he speaks Spanish); then one thing led to another and finally I found myself telling him about my dream (actually nightmare) last night.
When I woke up I found my whole body aching and all my muscles tense. In my dream there were military planes dropping bombs on the city I was in. I had experienced similar events in real life, being in Iran during the 80s, only I was a kid back then and in my dream last night I was the mom I am, trying to find a shelter for my A! I was then remembering my parents, and all those staying in Iran during the bombardment days and weeks and months, sleeping in the basement, the whole family, and listening to my father telling "Nokhodi"'s stories, and me listening to the sound of the military planes, the sound of the bombs exploding somewhere, and then thinking about my classmate who was crying in the school shelter that same day when the siren invited us all there, then imagining the cry of a baby were the bomb hit and scream of mothers and fathers. I was afraid of the lizards too, who resided in the basement. We were kids. Pure kids. And they were mothers and fathers. Sheltering us under the roof they shared with us. One for all and all for one? Was that the motto? I am amazed how they and we survived all that. And I was telling VM, an Iraqi, about this all ...
VM's life is really like a story itself I should tell you bits and pieces I know in another post may be, God willing.

weather

Green grapes; AC's cool breeze; ... Is it summer already?
It has been a really hot weekend. It is supposed to cool down again for the week to come.
We went for a two hour hike yesterday. Loved the green! Fresh. New. Crisp. Loved the wild flowers, orange, purple, and white.
M is cooking us some thing for lunch. The only ingredient I wanted to be in the dish was mushrooms. I hear the sound of sizzling veggies and the spoon banging the skillet. Cannot wait to see and taste it. It smells good.
A is walking in the apartment, singing, talking to himself, and pushing his bigger cars. Playing with himself for a change and not bugging either of his parents for a change to read to him, paint with him, or just be with him while he plays.
I have decided on my assignment. I have a new idea I need to act upon.
I have been thinking about my friends who are near and dear in my heart. I am in contact with them mainly via e-mail. I don't find myself missing them though. They are with me. And I enjoy their company, the thought of them being my friend and spending the time to write to me. I feel their positive thinking towards me and that energizes me.
Life is full of harmonies. There are times for chaos too. I am just enjoying this time of alignment.
It is a nice Sunday!

You do the math

“275,000” homes were destroyed during Hurricane Katrina”
“There are 50,000,000 people without health insurance in the States”
“With the price of a pair of shoes you can change lives”
…
“The cost of the war in Iraq has been $3,000,000,000,000”.

بودن در اینجا و حال

چند روز بود که این فکر توی ذهنم غوطه ور بود که امروز میم عزیزم دقیقا به همین نکته اشاره کرد. اینکه دوران نوجوانی و مخصوصا اول جوانی به طرز عجیبی میگذره. هر قدر هم بهت بگند که الان از هفت دنیا آزادی باورت نمیشه و به نظرت همه چیز زیادی مهم میاد. ولی الان که نگاه میکنه انگار حیفت میاد. میگی کاش بهتر گذرونده بودم.

مشکلات داشتیم، نه که نداشتیم. از مدرسه و معدل و کنکور بگیر تا خود دانشگاه و دوستیها و انتخاب همسر و محک زدنهای مخصوص اون دوران. الان که نگاه میکنی انگار اونموقع هیچ مساله ای واسه حل کردن نبود و تازه مشکلهای اساسی شروع شده!

اخیرا یک تعبیر تازه از دنیا و زندگی رو دارم سعی میکنم که درک کنم: انگار عقل جزیی ناگزیر از تجربه این خطاهاست. این تعبیر رو چند روز پیش خوندم. از اون لحظاتی بود که یکباره کتاب رو کنار میگذاری. مکث میکنی، و بعد یک لبخند از قلبت میاد و به لبت میشنه که هوم...

"جهان خلق عالمی است محکوم به حکم زمان و مکان و حالات غیر ارضی مدت و امتداد، حالاتی که از قوه خیال بشر بیرون است. این جهان همواره در ماضی و مستقبل و در «آنجا» است و هرگز حال و حاضر و «اینجا» نیست. حضور و حضرت مختص حق است و مجمع ازل و ابد که منزه از همه آفات زمانی و امور ممتده است و در عین حال مدت و امتداد را در بر گرفته و در آنها ساری است، نه فقط اول هر اولی است بلکه آخر هر آخری است." عارفی از الجزایر/ مارتین لینگز؛ ترجمه نصرا... پورجوادی- ص 130

یا حق!

هفده بدر

رفتیم هفده به در! با فامیل و دوستان و دوستانشون و دوستانمون. خوشحالم که ایرانیم و سنتی دارم که درش روح تازه طبیعت رو جشن میگیریم هر سال.

دوستان قدیمی از تورنتو پیشمون بودند. آخرش اونی که از قبل میشناسی یک چیز دیگست! یک جنس دیگست. نتیجه اینکه اونی که امروز شناختی رو مغتنم بدون چون فردا همون میشه از یک جنس دیگه!

آرمان از اینکه سنگ بندازه توی دریاچه و به قلپ صداش گوش بده خیلی خوشش اومده بود.

SIZDABEDAR

Have a happy and joyful "Nature's Day" you all!
It has been a good year so far. Unexpected good surprises have come our way and I am optimistic about a nice year ahead. There are also new thought coming to my mind, new visions if you will; I am finding the life moving fast forward. There is a beauty in it: there is nothing too serious to hold on to. It will pass, sooner or later. And at the end of the end there is returning to the beginning. Which is all nice. I am grateful for life!
Have a happy and peaceful year!

reading twice

we had decided to wear skirt/dress at work today with my girl colleagues. Here is an e-mail I sent this morning which made my colleagues to read it twice to understand!

"Morning summary girls,

I am afraid it is on the chilly side this morning, the same day we decided to go summary. No complaint about the weather though. I hope the nature never acts democrat, then especially in CA it should be sunny every day. Which means no wind or rain, which means no fruit or vegetation, no ranch for horses and cows, ... it will be just sunny!"

Nowruz

Happiest wishes for 1387!

In Hotel, Again

I am in a hotel room, but this time my M and A are with me. After a long day of talks and presentation and missing them it was soothing knowing that I can be with my beloved ones just with an elevator ride.
Tomorrow night the year will change. Happy Nowruz in advance!
Thanks God for 1386!

walk

We have started a 30-minute afternoon walk with two other colleagues. There is a creek running right beside the building I work in. The path is pretty with fresh green grass. Usually you see ducks floating on the water or napping by the bank. It is such a relaxing scenery. I have started to appreciate dedicating this walk to myself. Considering the fast pace of our lives and the urge at work to deliver before time, where it is very common to have your lunch at your desk, it is really an effort to find 30 minutes to dedicate to oneself.

جهان و کار جهان

یا حق

گفته بودم انگار در ذهن عوام رییس جمهور یعنی مرد سفید. که چرا به زن بودن یا سیاه بودن گیر میکنیم قبل از اینکه مغز و دل را محک بزنیم. امشب در برنامه ها میشنوم که کسی همین نقد را میکند. انگار آنچه گفته بودم انقدر هم که تصور میکردم واضح نبود! جای بحث و گفتگو داشت تا به این نتیجه برسیم!؟... "حجاب چهره جان"!

"نشان اهل خدا عاشقی است با خود دار که در مشایخ شهر این نشان نمیبینم"

شاید مشکل از محک زدن نیست. مشکل خود محک است.

امشب تکه های فیلم سنتوری که در نت هست را دیدم. و قسمتهایی از ماجرای آنها که نداریم. و این برنامه در مورد آن گروه تابع آن دین و آن گروه مشتاق آن کشور و آن گروه مرگ خواه آن مردم و کتاب و روایت و کلام و تفسیر و نقل و خطابه... حالا به هر زبان... افسانه و افسونی که مدهوش میکند...

"بگذار تا ز شارع میخانه بگذریم کز بهر جرعه ای همه محتاج آن دریم"

the sweetest imagination

Arman has started giving personality to his toys, especially Boo, his favorite stuffed animal in the shape of a frog. Yesterday he sat on his chair, while Boo was laying there before Arman. So he started laughing sweetly as he was sharing the sit with Boo. Then he realized the sit is too small for them both and he was crushing Boo. So he laughed even louder! Hugging Boo, he started sharing his snack with it :)
Later, his color pencils became alive. He would call them each by their colors, and then talk to each of them individually and then shoot each to one corner.
Later, playing withtoy jungle animals, he started feeding the Elephant and the Giraffe from the small toy tree leaves.
I adore this imagination he has got.

یک یکشنبه بعد از ظهر

آه ه ه ه

م و آرمان خوابند و من بعد از مدتهاااااا رسیدم کمی وبگردی کنم. حس خوبیه!

اسفند

باز باران با ترانه و بهار با طراوت و نویی در راهه. هر سال این روزهای اسفند که میشه حس خوب و شگفتی دارم. انگار یک جور امید که سال که نو میشه کلی تغییرهای نو و (خدا بخواهد) مثبت هم باهاش همراهه.

این چند ماه گذشته اینجا خیلی بارون اومد. این هفته های اخیر که هوا هم رو به گرمی بود من رو یاد ایام نوروز اصفهان مینداخت: نم بارون و بوی خاک نم خورده و بوی شکوفه ها و نوییه سبزی چمنها و ... هیچوقت با خودم چتر نمیبردم بیرون. بارونهای اونجا رو خیلی دوست داشتم.

امسال ظاهرا لحظه سال تحویل ما در حومه واشنگتن خواهیم بود. قرار شد یک سفره هفت سین مینیاتوری بچینیم. به تعبیر خواهر کوچیکه سالی پر از سفر خواهد بود و به امید خدا سفرهای خوب.

A Beautiful Mind

I am trying to sleep and my mind is full of work-related stuff. I wake up and first thing on my mind is? Job. Then I am at work and I am thinking about? Well of course, job! I am turning to a workaholic? Last night I tried thinking about Hooman joon not to think about job, and this morning I started writing my blog in my mind to force myself out of job-related hurdles and their thoughts.

There is a lot going on at work. On the positive side the yearly evaluation turned out to be really nice and I am happy. I am supposed to be louder though! And not too polite!

As you can see I decided to update my weblog whenever I can, even if it is when I am at work, so bear with me and my English story telling.

Arman is growing new passions, especially for truck, van, mini-van, bus, mini-bus, all of which besides train. There is a rail road track a few miles from where we live. If he hears the sound of the train whistle he gets all excited and tries to find it.

We go to park every day after I/M pick him up if it is not wet. Last night he was telling M what we did:
“park, sen baasi (playing in sand), taab abaasi, Arman sor sore, maamaan sor sore” …!!
Well, yeah, I was sliding down the slide with him.

The Movie: "Bootik"

What?...
I am not sure if I got it. Sad movie though. Strange too. Real? Very much possible. Better than many other Persian movies I had seen. Nice plays. Dialogue was not bad.
But, ... what?!

longing

I just want to go somewhere. Alone. Sip some tea, and listen to a live guitar performance.

هومن

هومن، متولد هیجده بهمن هشتاد و شش. ندیده دوستش دارم.